Please help! What do I do?
Suggestion:
Your doctor is there to give medical advice – *not* parenting advice. There is no need to force this… it's something she'll outgrow on her own. There is honestly no need for both of you to be so upset when you know how to fix it. I nursed my son to sleep until he was eight months old and around then *he* decided he didn't need it anymore. For the next month I patted his back to get him to sleep and shortly after that he did it on his own. It's a lot less traumatic to go at the child's pace than force them to do something they may not be developmentally ready for.
I think a lot of people try to break the nursing to sleep habit because at the end of the feed they're sucking for comfort, not food. But personally I don't see this as a bad thing and I never minded it.
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I recommend you get a HoMedics SoundSpa Lullaby With Picture Projection (available at walmart – http://www.walmart.com/ip/HoMedics-SoundSpa-Lullaby-With-Picture-Projection/5913225). It plays soothing music (even has rain and heartbeat sounds) and also projects a moving picture onto the ceiling. Really comforting for babies. The biggest thing is to just let her stay in bed, even though it's hard. If you keep her laying down, she will fall asleep eventually. Right now, you just have her stuck in a bad routine. You need to establish a new routine – like turning on the music/night light, giving a paci, and laying her down for bed. Just stick to it, and she will too.
Ignore the doctor's poor advice and go pick up your baby. She'll only be a baby for a short while, so give her the comfort she needs. There's no proven benefit to forcing an infant to "self-soothe", and there's plenty of evidence that leaving a baby to cry-it-out can be harmful. Once you've calmed your baby (and yourself), have a look at the links below.
we had to do the same thing with our son. you can do it the "nice" way like you're doing, however from my experience that only made things worse. what we ended up doing is picking a bedtime, taking Marcus in his room, giving him a bottle then shutting the door and letting him cry it out. The doc actually told us to do this. He said as far as the crying goes, if it lasts more than 20min then go in and soothe but otherwise you just have to grin and bear it. it sounds harsh, but it works!
Ignore your doctors advice and go back to nursing and rocking her down.
Your doctor is giving you parenting advice, bad advice at that, and it isn't his place to give it. It's not medically related, you can ignore it safely.
You don't have to make your child self soothe. Self soothe is a choice.. just like disposable diapers are a choice.. You choose what to do here.. not the doc.
You ignore your doctor's advice — it may be his personal preference, but it isn't medical advice.
Do NOT leave your 4 month old to CIO.
I'm so over all these FAKE mothers who are against a baby falling asleep on their own or with a bottle!!!! Go ahead.. Give me a thumbs down..
My advice, do not put her in her bed while she is wide awake! You need to wait until she is almost into a deep sleep. You will learn how to tell when she is almost to that point. He breathing pattern will change and you will feel he go a little more limp. When she gets to this point lay her in her bed and either rock her back and forth or pat her bottom. My son likes it when I rub his forehead. When her eyes start to close again, leave her be. If she wakes give her the pacifier and rub her, pat her, what ever you have chosen to do. You may have to pick her up again and rock her again. Don't let the crying go for 10 minutes though.. 5 is long enough. It's hard to get into the routine with a 4 month old.. I know this because mine is 4 months old now. Once I get him to where he is almost asleep and then into his bed he sleeps "like a baby" all night long.
Your Doctor is right.
Babies have to learn to go to sleep by themselves.
Not on the boob or rocking etc etc.
After her feed. Wake her up if she is asleep. Change her nappy or something.
Put her in her crib. Leave. Make sure the room is dark. Helps between night and day.
Wait 5 minutes. If she is crying, go back in. Softly reassure. NO singing. The less interaction the better. leave. wait 5 minutes. go back in reassure. leave. repeat, repeat, repeat and she will go to sleep eventually.
Do not pick her up! Be calm. Be consistant.
Use a timer. It's better than clock watching!
It will not harm your baby.
Also, make sure all the normal noises are going on, like TV etc.
Or you will have a light sleeper.
You have to do this for every nap/sleep.
Within a week usually, they have learnt to go to sleep by themselves.
The rule is, start as you mean to go on